I talk too much. Maybe because I work from home alone. I'm alone quite a lot during the day and then can really only have limited conversations with my children. Bernie and I seem to talk about house stuff a lot.When I travel up to the office where I am employed I tend to get into long conversations with colleagues. Now that I think about it I'm talking everyone's ear off. I guess I just really miss being there, and hearing about the day to day lives of single New Yorkers. It's embarrassing in retrospect. This blathering woman from the suburbs.
I can connect with these people. They are interesting. They know what I mean. I'm just plain odd around here. I guess it all just spills out. I can't be the only person who hasn't fully embraced the typical SAHM lifestyle around here. I swear they must all think we are crazy. Maybe I just think too much.
There is one woman up the block named Joan. Joan is a really good lady. She is open-hearted.
I like people who can speak from the heart. Joan is overwhelmed and I know how she feels. She works and takes care of everything at home to boot. Somehow when I lived that way I felt more connected to reality.
What's wrong with me. I can create my own reality here! Gosh, my mind is so strange. I feel like there is a plexiglass wall between me and what I can do to make things the way I want them. I'm stuck and I don't know why. I think, if only I had more time...but when I have time, I do mindless things like housework or laundry. These tasks are never ending, no satisfaction to be had. I need some sort of inspiration. A MUSE perhaps!
6 comments:
i hear you! i'm always trying to fit in wherever i go. the best policy is to be yourself, no matter. let your 'Muse' be the personification of your past (that figure you always think is following you in life) - it's a man or a woman - or just a spirit; it's actually you, or rather, the goddess you *really* are in your dreams. xo - andrea
The muse in your life is your life. It can be as small as a Ryans toenail, or as loveable as a dog who chews up brand new leather shoes.
perhaps it is the flowers that seem to grow a foot overnight.
:)
I sound terribly lonely don't I? Thanks for the comments. Sometimes my mind is a terrible neighborhood to be walking alone at night.
you don't sound lonely at all! introspective and wise. you sure can add my silly poetry blog to your page :) - thanks for asking! i probably sound like a lunatic (ah well).
Hey, you don't talk too much. Coe on, you need to talk more! Hey, have you ever considered volunteer work or does that sound too old lady for you....maybe too young to be pushing a juice cart at on the rehab wing at Robert Wood Johnson. You already mantioned that you hate the PTA. Understandable. I think you should get addicted to the gym the way you walked that track at HHS....yeah! Do what it is that makes yer heart sing. I saw a bike that would be perfect for you.
Try a banana Ang. And keep writing...we should do a trip into the city again. Lets do.
its more like...the heart is willing but the flesh is weak.
I should add more water and a banana strawberry based furtilizer (sp).
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